I Still Love You
by The Queen of Double Standards
Summary: Kaito is happy. He's moved on with his life. But his ex-girlfriend, Miki, hasn't. When he gets a call from her, the married man can't help but feel yearning for her. Oneshot.


**Author's Note: For mipiko :)**

**I Still Love You**

_'Cause I still love you  
><em>_This I must confess  
><em>_I guess I still need you  
><em>_I feel I have to tell you this again  
><em>_Yes I still want you  
><em>_These words I did not plan  
><em>_So if I've interrupted anything  
><em>_I promise I won't call you again  
><em>-Still by Frankie J

"Kaito dear, could you get that?" called Miku from in front of the oven, where she was busy concocting some strange recipe Kaito was afraid to try for supper. Any chance to get away from the kitchen was a good one, so Kaito quickly dropped the paperwork he'd been doing at the table to answer the phone.

"Hello, Shion residence, Kaito speaking," he rang off habitually.

It was quiet for a moment before a soft response came from the other side. "Hello."

Kaito's heart jumped. That voice. He couldn't believe it. He refused to believe it. He must have been hearing things wrong. He glanced at the phone number, but it wasn't the one it should have been. He didn't know this number at all. Miku watched him, concerned, so he forced his tone to remain neutral as he said, "Could you wait a minute, I can't hear over the frying pan."

That was more than believable to Miku, but Kaito knew it was a lie and hated it. He slipped into the bedroom the two shared and closed the door. He took a deep breath and slid down against the door, hanging his head so that his bangs covered his eyes when he was steadily on the ground.

"Miki?" he wondered softly, hesitant.

"Yeah," she murmured in response.

She didn't say anything else, so he wondered, "Why are you calling me?"

She was quiet for a moment. "I'm sorry."

"What is it, Miki?" he wondered, keeping his voice quiet. He had no idea how Miku would react if she knew he was talking to Miki.

"I need to tell you something, Kaito."

Kaito leaned his head back against the door and stared at the ceiling. "I'm not sure if I want to hear it Miki."

Silence. "I'm sorry."

Kaito knew she was about to hang up, so he quickly said, "Just tell me, Miki." He regretted it a second later. Why had he stopped her? He hated these feelings surfacing in his heart, memories of times they'd spent together.

"I'm still not over you, Kaito." Her voice was so heartbroken, so weak. It tore him apart to hear her like that. "I'm sorry."

"Why are you calling me?" he questioned again.

"I still love you, Kaito. I've never gotten over it. I can't believe I ever hurt you so badly. I hate myself for hurting you in such a terrible way, and I hate myself for letting you go."

Kaito felt a yearning in his heart. He pushed back his bangs and sighed, "Miki, what do you expect me to do about that?"

She was quiet again. "I don't know. I'm sorry."

They were both quiet for a while. Then, Kaito told her, "I really should go, Miki. Miku is waiting for me."

He held the phone in front of him and stared at it for a moment, waiting for a response, his heart hurting when none came. He was about to hang up when the other side loudly cried, "Please wait!"

Kaito closed his eyes, torn apart. He'd wanted her to stop him, right? But how could he do that? He had Miku now. Still, he brought the phone back to his ear and questioned, "What is it, Miki?"

"Please, talk to me for a little while." Her voice was so hollow, so crushed. It broke his heart, and his mouth formed one word before he could stop himself.

"Okay."

His stomach did a little flip as he heard her breathe a sigh of relief. "Thank you, Kaito. I'm so sorry. Were you busy?"

"Miku was making dinner," he said. A part of him wanted to pretend that Miku didn't exist, but his loyalty to her kept him steady. "I was just keeping her company."

He imagined Miki smiling sadly when she spoke next. "Oh, right. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to take you away from her."

"She has me all the time, doesn't she?" he wondered, feeling sick to his stomach at his words, worried that they'd come off as bitter toward the woman he loved. "I don't think she'd mind if I talked to someone else for a little while."

"Even if it's me?" Kaito stayed silent, refusing to reply. "I'm sorry, that's not a fair question."

"No, it's not."

The two went quiet for a moment. Then, Miki said, "I've gone on a few dates since . . . since us."

"I see," replied Kaito carefully, wondering what it was she wanted to say by that. "How did they go?"

"They were all terrible. I gave up after a while." Her voice was falsely cheerful, portraying a dark anguish as she murmured, "None of them were you, after all. At the beginning, I was kind of hoping that it might be you when somebody would set me up, but it never was."

"You're the one who broke up with me," Kaito felt the need to defend, embarrassed by the petty tone in his voice.

"I know I did, and I realised how stupid that was when I saw you and Miku together. I've never gotten over you, Kaito. You're perfect, and I was stupid not to see that. I've loved you all this time, Kaito."

"Please stop it." Kaito had to force the words out.

"I'm sorry."

They went quiet, and Kaito listened to Miki's breathing on the other side of the line. Where was she right now? Was she all alone in her bedroom, left to deal with her pain by herself?

"Why did you call? Why now?" he questioned, needing to know. "It's been two years since we broke up, Miki. Why did you need to talk to me _now_ of all times?"

"I'm sorry," she whispered again. "I'm bothering you, aren't I?"

Kaito could help but feel angry. This was the girl who'd broken his heart two years ago, and now she had to call and make him confused all over again. She was going to break his heart all over again when she hung up. "Yes, Miki, you are. I'm with Miku now. I don't need to deal with this stress. I love her with all my heart, Miki, and she's pregnant. We're married, and she's having my child. I'm _happy_, Miki. Is there something wrong with that? Am I not allowed to be happy?"

He could hear tears in Miki's voice as she replied to him with a note of pleading in her voice. "I'm sorry, Kaito. I just . . . I just can't manage to get over you. I love you, Kaito, I always have. I still love you, and I always will. When I . . . when I heard that you had a child on the way, it killed me." She hiccupped, choking in her tears. "You have no idea how many times I've tried to call you. I've dialled your number and just stared at it for hours before finally hanging up. Learning about Miku was the final push I needed to make the call."

"Knowing that I was happy was what made you call?"

"Knowing that it was my last chance before I lost you forever was what convinced me to call you." Kaito wanted to reply, but she continued on at such a fast pace that he couldn't get a word in edgewise. "I'm so obsessed with you, Kaito. I swear, it's driving me crazy. All I think about is how terrible I was to you. The only thing that keeps me going is the memories of us. I need you so much, Kaito. Everything I do, I depend on you for, just like I did back that. When I think of your smiles that you'd always give me, anything seems possible."

"I can't do this, Miki." The girl went silent as Kaito cut her off, shaking his head to toss the memories away. Instead, he thought of Miku, his wife, the love of his life, the future mother of his child. "I can't talk to you anymore. I'm hanging up now."

"Please, Kaito," she begged in one last futile attempt. "I love you, Kaito. I want you so badly, and I need you so much."

"You've had two years, Miki," he informed her. "You've had two years to call, but you never did. I was still in love with you for two years, but I've moved on now, and you should, too." He hung his head and stared at the floor, holding back the vague reminiscence of tears he could feel in his eyes. "You waited too long, Miki. We're done now, and you have to deal with that."

"But I don't want to," she whispered. "I don't think I can."

"You have to, Miki."

The other line went quiet. "I see. I'm sorry, Kaito. I should have never called.

"I promise I won't call you ever again."

The dial tone signalled her exit, and, for a while, Kaito sat there listening to it. A part of him wished she'd call him again, but the other part told him to go outside the room to the kitchen. When Miku saw him enter the kitchen, she smiled cheerfully and popped a bite of whatever she'd been cooking into his mouth. After he'd swallowed it, she planted a loving kiss on his lips, her large stomach pressing against him as she did. Although Miki would be in his heart forever, he knew he'd made the right choice. He loved his wife and his future child. This was his life now. Still, he felt a sharp bite of regret as Miki's last words echoed through his mind.

_I promise I won't call you ever again._

**Author's Note: I do not own the song, obviously. I'm sorry this took so long! My idea I had before for this pairing just kinda died, but I like this one a lot better. Hope you liked it! Please review, lovely readers~ Hours to write, seconds to review!**


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